so there is this void in my soul. love. sex. drugs. food. people. places. things. etc; they all fail to help me feel any less empty. there are some people who i miss so fucking much. and i realized tonight that whether we were together or not; the hole in my heart will remain. like it is almost comforting to realize because i feel less of a sense of desperation. maybe their physical presence could give me an illusion of wholeness you know. like i love and miss them so much. yet i no longer have to depend on if i'm with them or not to feel even semi- okay. there's a sense of peace in knowing this. so ironic that my only relief is realizing that the emptiness i feel inside; is here to stay.